~My Space~
2004-08-09 - 4:09 p.m.
Where do I begin?
I guess first off to say that I "met" someone. Someone that has literally changed my life in such a short amount of time that I dont believe still that Im living in this realistic world. I fell for someone that I used to pass by,... someone that I used to just say "hi" to...someone that I never really took the chance to get to know. But, now I have. And I cannot believe what I have been missing for this time I have known her. She has shown me how to smile again. In fact, I cannot STOP smiling. Its odd, because she does all the little things that I always do for other people, Im not used to getting them done back to me. I dont deserve it, I dont deserve her, or so it feels. I cannot get enough of her, the way she smiles, the way she smells, the way she looks at me, the way I cant breathe everytime she walks into the room. I feel like a Danielle Steel book, but its true, all those sappy songs... come alive when you fall for someone so hard. I love our relationship...it is great. I couldnt ask for a better girlfrend, a better lover, a better anything. And for the first time in awhile, I am completely satisfied with her, and I have no desire to think of anyone else. I dont feel this feeling is going away anytime soon... .. And it feels even better to know that she feels the same way about me. That she craves me as much as I crave her, that she misses me, and mourns for my smile when I dont see her all day. Time is nothing in this relationship, I feel like I have been with her for forever. Her family loves me, and the weird this is, is that without acting or playing the part.... I REALLY really love them too. They make me feel like a part of the family sometimes, and I cannot tell you what a feeling it is to be part of such a loving family... when your mom tells you to "be careful" EVERY single time you walk out the door. Its perfect, ... just as my love for her is. Wow. I finally found that feeling that dominates every other relationship you have ever been in. That feeling where you lose yourself more and more everyday in their eyes.... where you love to learn more about them, and everytime you see the color baby blue you think of them because its their favorite color. Or when you hear a train you know that your hoping she cant hear it because you know that shes afraid of them, how her eyes light up at pom pon camp, how she wants to swim with dolphins, her favorite animal is the dog, how she has a freckle just under her left eye, how she always says shes going to become a nun, how her best friend is her mom, how she gets excited about little things like Lifetime original movies,.... little things, corny things... that come to life, that bring sentimental value to the emotions that are so undescribable.... that... .. .. you just lose yourself... .. or at least who you USED to be... you lose that person and you find this other person that is always so... .. happy... smiley, ... giddy,... elated...
